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When Should You Buy Your Child A Cellphone?

I am re-posting this in honor of the “Not Me” Movement and my guest appearance on “Safety Talk” with Personal Safety Expert Pete Canavan.

One of the decisions we face as parents is when to buy your child a cell phone. Their level of independence can be more important than their age.

I gave my daughter her first phone on her tenth birthday.

She kept asking me when she could have one. Since I wanted it to be a surprise I told her she couldn’t have one until she turned eleven.

She cried when she opened the box. Yes. I lied. But it was so worth it to see her happy face on her birthday.

Moments like these, you’ll always cherish and remember.

A few months later, my daughters and I went out for ice cream after a school concert. We met up with some of their friends and their moms. I was really surprised when one of the moms said to me “I couldn’t believe you got your daughter a phone. I didn’t buy my oldest daughter a phone until she was thirteen.”

Then another mom chimed in,”I know. I couldn’t believe it. Now my daughter keeps asking me for one too.”

Yep. I was “that” mom. I had no idea.

And quite frankly, I didn’t really care. What the other kids had and what other parents thought, wasn’t a factor in my decision.

It was fear.

Hannah was at the age where she wanted freedom. She would ask me if she could go for a ride on her bike. At first, I would only let her go around the block. Then a few blocks. Then the playground.

All I could think about while she was gone was the dreaded white van pulling up to her. Asking for directions or anything that would bring her to the car. Then zapping her with a Taser gun and throwing her into the van.

Extreme?

Maybe. But it’s how I felt. I would have let her take my cell phone but it was my business line. At the time I was a single working mother and couldn’t afford to miss a call.

I didn’t buy her a cell phone to spoil her.

It wasn’t even for her, although she loves it. It was for me. As a concerned parent I can now have peace of mind. Now I can stay connected at all times. She calls me or texts me to let me know where she is and when she will be home.

Now I can breathe a little bit easier.

Here are 5 questions to help you determine if you and your child are ready:

  1. Is your child ever alone without parental guidance?
  2. Does your child walk home from school or anywhere without an adult?
  3. How responsible is your child?
  4. Can you communicate openly with your child about internet safety?
  5. Does the cost of another cell phone fit into your budget?

There is no “right” age or time to buy your child a cell phone. Do what you think is best for you and your family. Don’t worry about what anyone else is doing or what the other moms say. It all depends on your child’s level of independence, your comfort level and what you can afford.

Happy phone shopping!